Second Thoughts on College Education

Parents generally expect their children to look forward to college as a way to get away from home and experience life on their own. This is not always the exact case, but many teenagers want to have the experience of moving on to college.

Some see it as a necessary step in becoming mature and progressing to the next point in their lives. If for some reason your child is not among that group, it can have a negative effect on how he or she performs academically.

It is difficult to understand how children will develop because they are all so different. Experiencing new things is very attractive to young people. However, this type character does not always dictate how children will feel about similar opportunities.

You may anticipate that your child won't want to fly from the nest when first given the chance. Whatever you expect, it is impossible to accurately predict how the course of events will take place.

How Far Away from Home?

Parents often want their children to attend the same university they went to themselves, but the distance that school is away from home might be a major factor.

If a young adult wants to attend school away from home, they might not want to be a long distance away. Studies indicate that a large majority of college students attend schools within a hundred miles of home.

The reason why some students don't make it at the next level is because they are too far removed from everything familiar to them. The fear of that happening is often in the back of a student's mind causing doubts about college.

Some students want something so much they will go anywhere to achieve it. They may even want to travel to another country. Then again, there are those who want to venture away from home, but in small steps so they can come home on weekends and not feel distanced and isolated. Just knowing home is within driving distance is comforting to some kids.

The Best Plan for Motivation

The truth is no parent can predict how their teenager will feel about college location. The best thing you can do is to encourage learning at the level your child is at the present time and always be positive about the future college experience.

Even if you are not sure that a particular college is right for your student, carefully choose the comments you make that can be interpreted to disfavor college in general. Then work with your student through the situation as more facts begin to present themselves.

Has Your High School Student Decided on a Major?

If you begin planning your child's college education and saving for the expenses like most parents, this stage of the process usually begins long before your son or daughter has decided on a major.

There is a smattering of high school students who already know emphatically what they want to do with their futures before they even choose a college, but the majority still has questions when graduation rolls around.

Parent Responsibility

As a parent, you should encourage your child to give some thought to different college majors that interest them. You should not press or attempt to force your child to accept a major based on your own desires, nor should you apply pressure to get a decision within a short timeframe. The time to begin asking and offering suggestions is no later than the 10th grade.

About 1/3 to 1/2 of the courses a student takes in college relate to a major, so it is important to have some basic idea of what direction your child will take at the start of college.

In a 4-year college, a student doesn't have to declare a major until the end of their sophomore year, but you'd prefer to avoid paying for classes that will have no relevance.

Having two majors due to uncertainty is a possibility at some colleges, but it makes academics harder for the student. Most often, the best choice is to have a major and a minor so that a switch can be made or graduate studies may be pursued.

There is some value in declaring late. The student has time to find areas of study that interest and challenge them.

A Difference in Career and Major

A college major does not always dictate what career the graduate will pursue, but accounting, nursing, or engineering, for instance, are trade specific majors that usually offer jobs within their general realms. Some majors have little to do with what profession is planned, only with preparing students for business futures. Many courses overlap and are required in numerous different and even unrelated majors.

Sometimes, in spite of how hard you work with your child to get an answer on a major, you will never arrive at anything concrete. You may consider a preliminary meeting between your student and an advisor to brainstorm and get a valued opinion on possibilities.

Don't stress if your student is undecided even going into their freshman year. This is not uncommon and college advisors are trained and experienced in helping your student make the right choices. Everyone is different and the best decisions are those carefully thought through and evaluated carefully, even if it requires a little more time.

5 People to Talk With About Attending College

If you want to help your high school student get admitted to the college of their choice, both of you should become familiar with 5 people who can contribute and make a difference. You probably already know one place you should start.

Guidance Counselor

You child should seek advice from the high school guidance counselor on what courses to take to best prepare for college, and the counselor should also encourage your student to sign up for the entrance exams that are necessary to enter college.

Counselors generally offer advice on what schools are a good fit for the individual student's desired degree, too; unfortunately, many counselors are overwhelmed because of their workloads. You may find it necessary to do most of the legwork yourself.

Notable References

Most colleges expect and/or require references from those who know a student personally and can substantiate their character and scholarly accomplishments. These letters are also usually needed for scholarship applications.

It is not possible to have too many reference letters. These should come from coaches, teachers, employers, school club advisors, and members of higher education when possible. Your child should start asking for letters long before it is necessary to apply to college.

Admissions Counselors

Every college has one, and it is their job and goal to make everything as clear as possible so your child has the best chance at admission. It may not always be possible to speak directly with the head of the department, but most schools have capable individuals to help answer questions.

Counselor for Financial Aid

There are important deadlines you must meet to be accepted for financial aid. These come much earlier than you might think. Every college has a financial aid department that explains what is needed and when. There is no penalty for applying early, and that gives you a much better chance of receiving earmarked funds.

Academic Advisor

Your student doesn't stop needing help after being accepted to college. Getting advice from the advisor at that level is very important to be sure that the right courses are taken for the degree that is pursued.

Every student is generally expected to meet with their assigned advisor before being allowed to attend class. Once assigned an advisor, typically this same person remains your student's guide throughout attendance, and their assistance can be of great benefit in many regards.

Someone representing each of these positions will be of valuable assistance to both you and your college student at this very important time in their life. It is essential to take advantage of every available resource.

Is Your Child's High School Performance Jeopardizing College Opportunities?

Many high school kids go through a phase of revolt where they don't perform up to their potential and think it amusing to appear as if though they don't understand and don't care whether they do or not.

They may fake ignorance of subjects they know very well. This is called the "Cute Idiot" syndrome, and unfortunately it is common; thank goodness in most cases it is also usually only temporary.

This nonsense usually originates from a student who is doing poorly academically and may not have any guidance from home to do any better. The sad thing is that students who are doing well in school often look up to the student and think of them as cool. They emulate the same wiseacre ways to seek the acceptance of the bad kid or to hopefully become more popular themselves.

Some of the signs to watch for if your child suddenly goes "brain dead" and wants to follow in the shoes of the person who is going nowhere are:

1. Always Late for School Activities - You should teach your child to be on time for any event they are expected to attend, and that definitely includes school. This should start in the kindergarten/elementary years and become routine. Being late can progress to cutting classes, too.

2. Losing or Forgetting Homework - This is one of those traits that aggravates teachers to no end. It soon becomes evident to educators that the student who does this doesn't care about class studies, and the teacher will lose interest in wasting time with such a goldbricker.

3. Creating a Scene in Class - The number one trait of a bad student is interrupting the teaching process by attempting to make a circus out of class. Trips to the principal's office probably won't do much good, except to provide some peace for the instructor. The parent usually gets some lame excuse of how their child was mistreated.

4. Postponing Assignments until the Last Minute - This is a problem with many students if their parents don't stay after them. It is a poor habit that may have nothing to do with the "Cute Idiot" syndrome. Still, you can be assured that the person influencing the mutiny is doing the same thing.

These are only four of the ways that a student can jeopardize college opportunities and decent grades because of listening to the wrong drummer. Unfortunately, things can get much worse and lead to many more problems both in school and at home. It is important for parents to get a handle on this behavior early, before extreme damage is done.

Imagine trying to get reference letters for college and scholarship applications from teachers and school officials who have labeled your child's behavior as unacceptable for college. Once the damage is done, it is hard, if even possible, to undo.

How Does Your Child Choose a College Major?

If you have friends who have already sent kids to college, you probably have heard stories about failure along with the ones on success. Failure isn't always indicative of talent or desire; it can be caused by simple mistakes in choice and judgment. Unfortunately, that can happen at the parent level on occasion.

You Can't Decide for Your Child

Some parents have predetermined ideas about what their children will be professionally when they are still very young, and the lesson all parents eventually learn is that their offspring have different plans and desires from those of the parents. A doctor might wish the same profession for his son, but medicine is not for everyone, or there would be more doctors than the world needs.

It is much better to coach a child to focus on what they want to do in life at a very early age than it is to simply wait for a decision or force a curriculum on them. Children should start narrowing down their career objectives by the 9th grade, and if a child enters their senior year with no clue as to what line of work interests them, it is time to have a discussion on the subject.

Their career or choice of major need not be too exact, but defining it to a broad category can save some tuition for classes at school that may not be necessary for a particular area of study.

Here are some tips that might help your child in choosing a college major.

1. You can find tests online that help your child select a major by simply choosing answers to multiple choice questions. This is a good start if a child is stuck, and the process often makes important points clear.

2. Base career objectives on marketable skills and employment in fields that are viable and will be so in the future.

3. Build on strengths, not hopes. A child who doesn't grasp some subjects very well and really doesn't improve with tutoring won't do well if those subjects are requirements in a career. A student who does poorly in math will struggle in a field of study such as electrical engineering or computer programming.

Choosing a college major has to rank within the top five decisions a young person makes. What they need most from their parents is for them to be helpful and supportive.

Never Take the SAT or ACT Too Lightly

Everyone knows that an SAT or ACT score is an important part of the college admissions process, and yet many parents send their kids to take the test without any preparation at all.

Either test is a measuring gauge of what a child has learned up to that point in the education system. To achieve the best possible scores on either of these tests, regardless of how good your child's grades are, some preparation is highly recommended.

How important is the SAT or ACT to a college? It is considered the second most important factor in the application. Scores in high school based on the degree of difficulty and any special academic accomplishments beyond those required provides the primary focus of admissions, but poor SAT or ACT scores can be a debilitating factor affecting a college's decision.

Increase College Offers

Higher SAT/ACT scores mean more choices for majors in college as well as more colleges that will have an interest in the student's attendance. While every college is concerned about filling classrooms and receiving tuition, it is the intent to take the students who will be better able to finish the courses and graduate with honors.

Everyone benefits from added points on the test, and some colleges won't even consider a student for acceptance if their scores fall below a certain minimum.

Sponsors offer scholarships every year to students they deem deserving of their offers. They also use the scoring on the ACT or SAT when determining who receives scholarships.

Do Not Underachieve

The student who "settles" for a score rather than attempts to do their best is limiting their potential. This is also indicative of how the student will pursue higher education and life in general. The parent should instill the importance of academic achievement early in the education process and reinforce that concept throughout a child's academic life.

Some study materials for the SAT and ACT are free, but the better prep packages do cost money. Consider it an investment in the child's education that can make the difference in overall college costs and the level of achievement at that level. Sometimes your school's guidance counselor keeps study material on hand to lend to students.

There are four primary fields of study represented in the SAT or ACT; these are Math, Writing, Critical Reading, and Vocabulary. Concentrating more on the weakest subjects is a proven way to get higher scores and achieve more balanced scoring, which is another consideration during evaluation for college acceptance.

Three Ways to Ensure College Success for Your Child

Parents of high school age children with plans to attend college must prepare in advance. Students who do well at the next level are the ones who began to think about taking that step years before it is time. Most often, the only way that will happen is if the parents press the issue.

Three ways you can help to ensure your student's success at college are:

1 - Choose Challenging High School Courses

Try to push them to take the more difficult classes, like the honors level high school courses. Research has shown kids who take the more difficult courses such as honors math, English, and science do better at college.

The reason why so many students don't make it through the first year of college is they have not learned to work hard enough at their studies. The study skills your child will need at the college level should already be developed before they attend.

2 - Keep a Positive Attitude

Taking harder courses may mean grades lower than those your child would make in easier level classes, but that should be expected. You must be encouraging and helpful instead of judgmental and negative. Try to focus on things you can do to assist, such as helping them find a tutor or suggesting they join a study group.

A positive attitude must be maintained all the way through the college application and selection process and beyond. As you know, even good students may not be accepted by their first college choice. A rejection should not be viewed as a bad situation, just an opportunity to excel at another school.

3 - Visit Colleges That Make Offers

If there is any possibility that your child will attend a particular college, it is highly suggested that both of you visit the campus before making a final decision. Arrange a campus tour in advance and allow sufficient time to cover the campus thoroughly. Discuss your findings at length frankly and honestly and make the decision together.

Two Plans for Parents for College Funding

If you haven't already decided on a vehicle for saving for your child's higher education, think about a couple of choices that have worked well for many other parents in planning funding for college. 


As always, it's best to speak to your personal financial advisor about what plan is best for your family. While I don't particularly endorse or recommend one savings plan over another, below are two possible options that have been in the news recently:

Upromise® for College

A small play on words (you promise) sets the tone for this plan, which originated in 2001. It is free to join and is based on your spending habits. Purchases you make earn as much as 25% cash back in a college fund or just a savings plan. This system works if you don't fall into a trap of buying some things just to get money back.

Some of the items that pay you back are groceries, online shopping, travel purchases, and dining out. Upromise® requires you to register credit cards, grocery cards, and debit cards along with your contact information.

While this sounds a little scary, it is necessary to be sure you get your full credit on purchases hassle-free, and the plan has been around for some time and has proven to be very reputable.

The 529 Plan

Named after Section 529 in the IRS Code, this plan is sponsored by educational institutions or individual states themselves. Every state now has at least one 529 Plan. The 529 offers flexibility in where a child goes to school because it is not state specific when the funds are withdrawn. Your child can live in one state, have a 529 in another, and go to college in a third state under most plans.

States regulate the plans they offer, so all regulations are not completely the same from one to another. A state is not limited to just one plan either, but may offer several. If the plan you choose meets the basic requirements, you have tax benefits for choosing to save in this manner.

The Difference Between Plans

The most obvious difference between the two plans is that the 529 has tax incentives, but it is also strictly a savings plan where you must take money and put it in the kitty.

Upromise® is a way to make money on the necessary and usual expenses in your life. Vendors who agree to Upromise terms do so to acquire your business, which is a good concept as long as you don't pay too much for the products or services or purchase items you don't really need.

You may find other college saving plans that suit your financial situation better or can be used in conjunction with either of these. The important thing is to find some way to put money back for this important part of your child's life, and the earlier you start the better.

When a High School Student Begins to Question if College is Right for Them

Many high school students go through a phase when they wonder if they are college material. Parents place expectations on their children that college is expected, but sometimes don't realize the doubt and concerns their high school student is facing regarding making important life changing decisions.

Kids go through the thought process of how they've gone to school for years and maybe need some time off. Or their grades might slip and they fear they won't be accepted at a preferred college or university.

There is a lot of peer pressure senior year when kids start to compare ACT/SAT scores and some students get accepted to choice colleges while others may not.

But none of these things should stand between your child going or not going to college if that is what they want to do.

All they may need is some motivation and guidance to keep them on the track to their educational goals. Research has proven that students with trustworthy mentors and/or dedicated parents perform better in school.

Monitoring your child's progress throughout high school is an indicator of when their performance may be falling. Maybe they need some assistance in a particular course, or to attend a summer program to develop their writing or reading skills. Maybe they are struggling in a course that has led them to question their ability to succeed in college.

Whatever the reason may be for this self doubt, keeping the communication lines open is essential to determine if and when a problem exists and then plan the right course of action. This is not always so simple and varies with each individual student.

Delicately try to open the subject for conversation and see where it leads. Keep communication lines open, but don't hover or pry. Monitor grades and if progress falls dramatically, try to offer solutions rather than criticism. It is often possible that a few hours of tutoring each week is all that is needed to get back on track.

Often the biggest challenge a parent faces regarding a high school teenager is showing they care without overdoing it. Continue to provide motivation, help when and where you can, and make sure they know they can talk to you.

Continue to focus on college as a positive path, and proceed as normal in the planning required for your child to attend college after high school. Both you and your student will know at some point if the plan should change and can then discuss possible alternatives.

Just don't give in too easily to their sudden desire to avoid college when it has been something both you and they have been planning all along. Most often it is just a phase they are going through and given a little time and encouragement, they will get back on track.